Wednesday, November 26, 2008
Tequilla Mockingbird
A Holiday Drink for You and Yours:
2 drams of Tequilla
3 cups ice
2 gold stars
3 purple hearts
1 lime
2 lousy explanations
1 wizened leprechaun
Toss in a blender and frappe, sir!
Jolly well frappe it!
2 drams of Tequilla
3 cups ice
2 gold stars
3 purple hearts
1 lime
2 lousy explanations
1 wizened leprechaun
Toss in a blender and frappe, sir!
Jolly well frappe it!
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
Moving On...
This Posting is Under Construction.
We are sorry for any inconvenience this may cause you.
The Management
We are sorry for any inconvenience this may cause you.
The Management
Email With Lesser Beings Hurts Me...
But to try to pull something sincere from the flaming email wreckage, there is this:
I saw Charlie Kaufman's directorial debut today. I hope Mike Leigh forgives me (but did not see Happy Go Lucky). Most everyone I was with hated it, but he speaks to me. I found it so lovely it made me cry. This is not what anyone else will say about it. I would tell people not to see it in fact, unless I wanted them to hate me too.
Oh well. There are so few people in the world with any real creativity and brilliance.
Most people don't understand abstract thought I find and don't like art, which concept is a simple one: The tension (or play) between reality and abstraction = art. The more abstract one gets the more the audience thins. I tell you, there are few and rare airplanes flying at the greatest heights. I don't blame them. The air is thin enough to make breathing difficult.
That being said, Mister WiFi explained to me why Mr. Rogers was a genius, not by shedding insight on Fred Rogers but on the concept itself.
He said, "He was totally original and could never be replicated...THAT is GENIUS." So maybe I'm a little less offended by the term. But it is a lonely and loosely knit one.
Also Jwolfe told me that Mr. Rogers had a song that said, "Some folks are fancy on the outside and some folks are fancy on the inside...Every body's fancy, every body's fine..." which also gave me a new love of the Mister R.
Then two friends joined his fan club on facebook and sent it my way...Here's where I admit I went with the river on that one...
Who knew this week would be so full of hard-core Fred Rogers Love?
Huh?
I saw Charlie Kaufman's directorial debut today. I hope Mike Leigh forgives me (but did not see Happy Go Lucky). Most everyone I was with hated it, but he speaks to me. I found it so lovely it made me cry. This is not what anyone else will say about it. I would tell people not to see it in fact, unless I wanted them to hate me too.
Oh well. There are so few people in the world with any real creativity and brilliance.
Most people don't understand abstract thought I find and don't like art, which concept is a simple one: The tension (or play) between reality and abstraction = art. The more abstract one gets the more the audience thins. I tell you, there are few and rare airplanes flying at the greatest heights. I don't blame them. The air is thin enough to make breathing difficult.
That being said, Mister WiFi explained to me why Mr. Rogers was a genius, not by shedding insight on Fred Rogers but on the concept itself.
He said, "He was totally original and could never be replicated...THAT is GENIUS." So maybe I'm a little less offended by the term. But it is a lonely and loosely knit one.
Also Jwolfe told me that Mr. Rogers had a song that said, "Some folks are fancy on the outside and some folks are fancy on the inside...Every body's fancy, every body's fine..." which also gave me a new love of the Mister R.
Then two friends joined his fan club on facebook and sent it my way...Here's where I admit I went with the river on that one...
Who knew this week would be so full of hard-core Fred Rogers Love?
Huh?
Sunday, November 16, 2008
Email of the Day:
And the Email of the Day award once again goes to my lovely mother, who just gets better:
"Dear Darla, Nothing new, just miss talking with you! I just read about the fires around L.A.; hope you are far from any of them; take extra vitamin C and other vitamins.
Come visit us if things get worse where you live!
Your Dad had a scary accident on the way home yesterday--he hit a patch of black ice in the Pathfinder before he could put on the 4-wheel drive. He spun all over the road then off it sideways, down a hill about 100 feet without rolling, through a barbed wire fence. He drove with the 4-wheel drive through snow to a nearby ranch house where the owner had just arrived. He offered to pay for the fence, but the man said it belonged to the Fed. govt.--he was happy he had told him so he could check his livestock and make sure none had gotten out. When your Dad got back to the place he went off, there were a truck and boat which had been off before him, a semi, a van on it's top, 2 ambulances and several highway patrol cars. He thought sure he was going to roll, but is fine, the car has a hundred or so scratches from the wire--whew! Thank the Lord he was O.K. He had been fitted with stuff for sleep apnea testing, had tape and wires from his finger and neck, figured the rancher must have wondered what that was about. His heart meds kept him from feeling fear or anxiety, since they slow down his heart and block adrenaline--don't know if that's good or not. So, a quiet Saturday--and I am tired and think I will hit the sack--love you, sweetie, punkin' pie darling! Lots of love, Mom
"Dear Darla, Nothing new, just miss talking with you! I just read about the fires around L.A.; hope you are far from any of them; take extra vitamin C and other vitamins.
Come visit us if things get worse where you live!
Your Dad had a scary accident on the way home yesterday--he hit a patch of black ice in the Pathfinder before he could put on the 4-wheel drive. He spun all over the road then off it sideways, down a hill about 100 feet without rolling, through a barbed wire fence. He drove with the 4-wheel drive through snow to a nearby ranch house where the owner had just arrived. He offered to pay for the fence, but the man said it belonged to the Fed. govt.--he was happy he had told him so he could check his livestock and make sure none had gotten out. When your Dad got back to the place he went off, there were a truck and boat which had been off before him, a semi, a van on it's top, 2 ambulances and several highway patrol cars. He thought sure he was going to roll, but is fine, the car has a hundred or so scratches from the wire--whew! Thank the Lord he was O.K. He had been fitted with stuff for sleep apnea testing, had tape and wires from his finger and neck, figured the rancher must have wondered what that was about. His heart meds kept him from feeling fear or anxiety, since they slow down his heart and block adrenaline--don't know if that's good or not. So, a quiet Saturday--and I am tired and think I will hit the sack--love you, sweetie, punkin' pie darling! Lots of love, Mom
Something More Spicy, Please!
I am in need of something more spicy.
Blandness has been BORING ME TO DEATH.
Why do only the French understand that banality is well, banal. And that nothing is worse than mediocrity or Ennui. Why? WHY? WHY!!!!
Trying to date boring men always makes me boring...
No more, I swear this time, no more.
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Blandness has been BORING ME TO DEATH.
Why do only the French understand that banality is well, banal. And that nothing is worse than mediocrity or Ennui. Why? WHY? WHY!!!!
Trying to date boring men always makes me boring...
No more, I swear this time, no more.
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Thursday, November 6, 2008
Entry Omitted
We are very sorry to announce that this entry has been omitted.
Thank you for continuing to visit my blog despite this fickle business.
The Management
Thank you for continuing to visit my blog despite this fickle business.
The Management
A Brief Email Exchange: Part I
Dear Darla, my computer wouldn't let me open your news page!!!
Anyway, we both like Obama a lot, saw him here months ago and are looking forward to having him for our President.
My favorite Presidents have been Dems--clear back to J.F.K. whose grave we visited yesterday, Jimmy Carter and I think R.F.K. would have made it to the Presidency and been great.
That said, I think this is most exciting because of the history of blacks in the U.S. --it is a miracle, as an elderly black man in a wheel chair said.
It is the beginning of waking our country up again to those issues and making things right for the race we have wronged.
In a nutshell. It's nice to be on the same side of things as kids and hubby!
Well, back to the laundry, off to the store for yogurt and bananas, our daily breakfast!
Love to see you sometime soon! Lots of love and kisses!
Mom
Anyway, we both like Obama a lot, saw him here months ago and are looking forward to having him for our President.
My favorite Presidents have been Dems--clear back to J.F.K. whose grave we visited yesterday, Jimmy Carter and I think R.F.K. would have made it to the Presidency and been great.
That said, I think this is most exciting because of the history of blacks in the U.S. --it is a miracle, as an elderly black man in a wheel chair said.
It is the beginning of waking our country up again to those issues and making things right for the race we have wronged.
In a nutshell. It's nice to be on the same side of things as kids and hubby!
Well, back to the laundry, off to the store for yogurt and bananas, our daily breakfast!
Love to see you sometime soon! Lots of love and kisses!
Mom
A Brief Email Exchange: Part II
Dear mom,
Your email neglected a few small details that I hope it's not too terribly annoying to ask you for:
Could you kindly send me a list of all the presidents in the descending order you like them, last name first?
Additionally I would appreciate a bit more on the history of blacks in this country in essay format.
And, finally, I will need to know the kind of yogurt you planned on having for breakfast.
Thanks ever so!
Much love,
Darla
Your email neglected a few small details that I hope it's not too terribly annoying to ask you for:
Could you kindly send me a list of all the presidents in the descending order you like them, last name first?
Additionally I would appreciate a bit more on the history of blacks in this country in essay format.
And, finally, I will need to know the kind of yogurt you planned on having for breakfast.
Thanks ever so!
Much love,
Darla
A Brief Email Exchange: Part III
Dear honey,
Strawberry!
History forthcoming.
Order of favorites, well--I'll have to think on that--some are a real tie.
Love you honeybuttons!
Will send on actual news of honey just in case--Glad to hear from you anytime! I'm at school so gotta run!
Lotsa love,
Mom
Strawberry!
History forthcoming.
Order of favorites, well--I'll have to think on that--some are a real tie.
Love you honeybuttons!
Will send on actual news of honey just in case--Glad to hear from you anytime! I'm at school so gotta run!
Lotsa love,
Mom
A Brief Email Exchange: Part IV - Actual News of Honey
Dear Darla,
Seems like honey and cinnamon will cure everything but bad attitudes and mouse infestations. Bummer.
"Facts on Honey and Cinnamon: It is found that a mixture of honey and Cinnamon cures most diseases. Honey is produced in most of the countries of the world. Scientists of today also accept honey as a 'Ram Ban' (very effective) medicine or all kinds of diseases. Honey can be used without any side effects for any kind of diseases. Today's science says that even though honey is sweet, if taken in the right dosage as a medicine, it does not harm diabetic patients.
Weekly World News, a magazine in Canada, in its issue dated 17 January,1995 has published a list of diseases that can be cured by honey and cinnamon as researched by western scientists."
Love,
Mom
Seems like honey and cinnamon will cure everything but bad attitudes and mouse infestations. Bummer.
"Facts on Honey and Cinnamon: It is found that a mixture of honey and Cinnamon cures most diseases. Honey is produced in most of the countries of the world. Scientists of today also accept honey as a 'Ram Ban' (very effective) medicine or all kinds of diseases. Honey can be used without any side effects for any kind of diseases. Today's science says that even though honey is sweet, if taken in the right dosage as a medicine, it does not harm diabetic patients.
Weekly World News, a magazine in Canada, in its issue dated 17 January,1995 has published a list of diseases that can be cured by honey and cinnamon as researched by western scientists."
Love,
Mom
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
Spooky Halloween Email From Mom:
Dear Darla,
Night before last my tooth fell out as I was sewing, my front left crown, that is. Your dad and I talked about writing a novel titled, "Oh, Shit, My Tooth Fell Out." sounds pretty trite, I know.
Just a way to get started.
I had just eaten a carameled apple, maybe a connection, but after 25 years?
I wanted to finish my quilt before 10:00, when your dad planned to go to bed, so I kept sewing for a while. Besides, I was in no hurry to look in the mirror, but I knew I should clean my mouth with Peroxide, so eventually I did.
When I went to bed I showed your father my teeth--he turned away in agony. I looked very haggle-toothed with the little piece of a tooth left in my mouth.
My brother and brother-in-law suggested I try to scare the kids at school for Halloween, the dental receptionist mentioned me looking like a Jack-O-Lantern.
I got some glee in smiling at my classroom's teacher when I took the cupcakes to school, told her she could decide if I should come in for a half day or not. She smiled dryly and told me to stay at home and relax.
Other friends noticed right away and wondered how I had fixed my tooth to look that way for Halloween, etc.
I got tired of it, however, and wanted to be normal again, but not before I began to empathize with people I know with no teeth, physical disabilities, etc. I began to fantasize about an arm or my nose falling off and wonder why a half tooth could make such a difference in my appearance and self-worth.
But it was worth all the trouble, because I had a sick day to play, have lunch in the park, shop, sew, make phone calls and luxuriate in my freedom. Hallelujah!
It took the dentist about 15 minutes to cement it back in--a fortunate case, since the tooth didn't break off. After more than 25 years, he said it had been well done, and I need to write my retired dentist and thank him for that.
Your dad is happy for me, he says, that we don't have to fly to D.C. with my missing tooth, nothing compared to how happy I am.
That's it, my darling, something to make you smile and be thankful that you can!
Here is a number that called for you, whatever you wish to do with it: Patti XXX-XXX-XXXX She seemed bothered when I repeated Ratty? back to her, maybe was the type.
Lots and lots of love, Mom
Night before last my tooth fell out as I was sewing, my front left crown, that is. Your dad and I talked about writing a novel titled, "Oh, Shit, My Tooth Fell Out." sounds pretty trite, I know.
Just a way to get started.
I had just eaten a carameled apple, maybe a connection, but after 25 years?
I wanted to finish my quilt before 10:00, when your dad planned to go to bed, so I kept sewing for a while. Besides, I was in no hurry to look in the mirror, but I knew I should clean my mouth with Peroxide, so eventually I did.
When I went to bed I showed your father my teeth--he turned away in agony. I looked very haggle-toothed with the little piece of a tooth left in my mouth.
My brother and brother-in-law suggested I try to scare the kids at school for Halloween, the dental receptionist mentioned me looking like a Jack-O-Lantern.
I got some glee in smiling at my classroom's teacher when I took the cupcakes to school, told her she could decide if I should come in for a half day or not. She smiled dryly and told me to stay at home and relax.
Other friends noticed right away and wondered how I had fixed my tooth to look that way for Halloween, etc.
I got tired of it, however, and wanted to be normal again, but not before I began to empathize with people I know with no teeth, physical disabilities, etc. I began to fantasize about an arm or my nose falling off and wonder why a half tooth could make such a difference in my appearance and self-worth.
But it was worth all the trouble, because I had a sick day to play, have lunch in the park, shop, sew, make phone calls and luxuriate in my freedom. Hallelujah!
It took the dentist about 15 minutes to cement it back in--a fortunate case, since the tooth didn't break off. After more than 25 years, he said it had been well done, and I need to write my retired dentist and thank him for that.
Your dad is happy for me, he says, that we don't have to fly to D.C. with my missing tooth, nothing compared to how happy I am.
That's it, my darling, something to make you smile and be thankful that you can!
Here is a number that called for you, whatever you wish to do with it: Patti XXX-XXX-XXXX She seemed bothered when I repeated Ratty? back to her, maybe was the type.
Lots and lots of love, Mom
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
Dreaming of Jew Cheeks Past . . .
I almost married my crazy friend Jew Cheeks the other night. For the SECOND time. I had to call it off though, due to bad weather--Actually there was a blizzard of work to be done and fortunately for the rest of my life, I am the industrious type.
My insane work ethic saves me from many mistakes.
It's not the best excuse, but it's what I got.
But back to the almost wedding. Jew Cheeks was drunk on a bed of cheap fur, surrounded by other drunk friends that he decided were his bachelor party. It seemed the absolute wrong thing to do, so in keeping with the rest of my life, I decided to go for it.
Soon after I said yes, I would marry my darling little ewok, two other friends, The Garbett and The Kneedler, announced that their cats were also engaged to be wed, asking me to be the maid of honor. I said yes to that too (I hope you guys weren't kidding!).
It was a glorious day.
When I offered to make it a double wedding (probably because I've always wanted to say, "Minister, make it a double!") Team G & K seemed a little offended. Said The Kneedler "There is no way we're going to let you cut in on our cats' wedding"
Fine, fine. Back to wedding planning! Whew! It really tires a girl out!
But worth it!
As the charming Dr. Faust said to Jew Cheeks and myself, ours would be an amazing coming together (again) of two disparate tribes:
A POLISH-JEWISH WEDDING with a BIG FAT STUPID RECEPTION.
I can just hear the Priest (Rabbi) now:
Do you, Jew Cheeks take Gruzzle Nuzzle (what my fiance calls me--he can't pronounce or spell my long last name) as your unlawful wedded wife?
And do you, Gruzzle Nuzzle take Jew Cheeks to be your something something something? And honor and cherries and something something something?
I now pronounce you Pollock and Jew. . . You may now kiss the Pole.
And then the skies began to darken. And I had work to do.
My insane work ethic saves me from many mistakes.
It's not the best excuse, but it's what I got.
But back to the almost wedding. Jew Cheeks was drunk on a bed of cheap fur, surrounded by other drunk friends that he decided were his bachelor party. It seemed the absolute wrong thing to do, so in keeping with the rest of my life, I decided to go for it.
Soon after I said yes, I would marry my darling little ewok, two other friends, The Garbett and The Kneedler, announced that their cats were also engaged to be wed, asking me to be the maid of honor. I said yes to that too (I hope you guys weren't kidding!).
It was a glorious day.
When I offered to make it a double wedding (probably because I've always wanted to say, "Minister, make it a double!") Team G & K seemed a little offended. Said The Kneedler "There is no way we're going to let you cut in on our cats' wedding"
Fine, fine. Back to wedding planning! Whew! It really tires a girl out!
But worth it!
As the charming Dr. Faust said to Jew Cheeks and myself, ours would be an amazing coming together (again) of two disparate tribes:
A POLISH-JEWISH WEDDING with a BIG FAT STUPID RECEPTION.
I can just hear the Priest (Rabbi) now:
Do you, Jew Cheeks take Gruzzle Nuzzle (what my fiance calls me--he can't pronounce or spell my long last name) as your unlawful wedded wife?
And do you, Gruzzle Nuzzle take Jew Cheeks to be your something something something? And honor and cherries and something something something?
I now pronounce you Pollock and Jew. . . You may now kiss the Pole.
And then the skies began to darken. And I had work to do.
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